My personal experience

Fertility is something I didn’t particularly think about when I was younger, I took it for granted.  I’d always wanted to have children.  I always thought it would happen when I wanted it to.  What I didn’t anticipate was not meeting someone I wanted to have children with until I was older.  But I still thought that having children would be straightforward, until it wasn’t.

By nature I’m generally optimistic and upbeat, and was determined not to let this be the be-all-and-end-all of my world.  To do that I needed to come to terms with another part of myself, as there was a whole well of emotions in there I didn’t usually feel - frustration, rejection, sadness, fatigue, judgement, failure, self-doubt, isolation.   And so much loss.  Loss of the life I imagined.  Loss of the easy joy around pregnancy, whether my own or someone else’s.  Physical loss of babies that I wanted to love as I watched them grow.  Loss of friendships and connections with others who couldn’t understand what I was going through.  

A difficult thing to share with someone struggling with infertility, even by someone that has struggled with it themselves, is that I did eventually find success over 6 years after my first appointment for assisted conception and following multiple losses.  A pregnancy through Covid, and a quiet first year has presented its own challenges however I know that I am one of the ‘lucky’ ones. 

How can I help you?

Experiencing issues with infertility and pregnancy loss can present a turmoil of emotions to work through.  If you are looking to talk to someone who understands the complexity of those emotions then I am here to listen.